Hey! How are you?
No really…how are YOU?
I remember responding to this question with “I’m good” or “I’m fine” when really, I wasn’t. In fact, I recall saying this when I was in the midst of things such as unhealthy intimate relationships, family drama, draining friendships, an unfulfilled job and a disconnected marriage.
Why? Because I didn’t trust myself, and I never considered my Truth.
Can you relate? Cool. It sounds like we have something in common!
There is still a debate between my parents as to who chose my name, so I’mma go with Shaquan was a God thing and roll with that.
I believe in God…Period. Point. Blank.
I have a husband and two boys.
I am a Taurus with stubborn ways.
I love fresh popcorn.
I have the gift of discernment.
I am a sucker for sweets.
I have a side-eye for microwaves.
I say cuss words.
I believe Grease 2 is better than the original.
I own a successful business.
I am super wordy.
I crack myself up at least three times per day.
I have a Bachelor of Science degree in Consumer and Family Economics, with an emphasis in Consumer Affairs.
I intentionally slipped on a banana peel once. There is a story behind it.
I have a circle of family and friends who love the authentic me.
I am a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated.
I speak to strangers.
I believe in hugs over handshakes.
I define my happiness.
I am unique.
I used to have a job.
I used to believe I could get over hurt and pain.
I used to be good at faking happiness.
I used to feel stuck.
I was afraid of the unknown.
I used to accept less than what I was worth.
I didn’t know my self-worth.
I used to say “I don’t know” when I didn’t want to speak my Truth.
I used to let people drain my energy.
I used to struggle in my marriage.
I used to have a fear of falling out of love.
I used to believe I was alone.
Sound familiar? If so, you understand how the stress of tolerating, dealing with or trying to ignore things that don’t work for you is an easy way to lose focus and disconnect from the Truth of who you are.
I want you to know I’ve been lost in myself, and it was a lonely place to be. My thoughts were draining, my actions were destructive and the outcome was an unhealthy relationship with myself.
I was non-fulfilled in my marriage and I was tired of settling, ignoring and dealing with my unhappiness.
Going through the process of finding my Truth, I grew closer to God, I experienced a shift in my mindset and I learned life changing lessons which are too valuable to keep to myself.
Marriage is tough sometimes; it’s not just you. I understand your challenges and I want you to know…you are not alone. There was a purpose in my pain and I was called to share my story and teach you want I learned because I believe it will help you too.
“Choose your attitude” was something my husband would tell me when my Taurus temper came out to play. I had to learn how to control my thoughts, feelings and actions, especially when they didn’t give me the outcome I wanted.
Truth is, everyday won’t be a good day.
Destructive thoughts such as anger, fear, resentment, self-doubt, guilt, second-guessing, worrying and things of the sort don’t work for me. When I feel myself giving energy to foolishness, including things or people, my conscious kicks in to remind me of what I can control. Choosing my attitude forces me to take ownership of why and how I show up, and be accountable for my actions to get what I want.
I am a Certified Professional Coach (CPC). This means I have completed the required hours of training and course work, as identified by the International Coaching Federation, through an accredited program, Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching. The process of coaching involves thought-provoking questions; the kind you may find uncomfortable or difficult to answer. My role as your coach is to provide you with tools to navigate your life’s journey, be your cheerleader and challenge you trust the process (i.e. trust God) and do the work.
I’m also an Energy Leader Index Master Practitioner (ELI-MP), which means I am certified to teach and assess how your energy influences your overall being as it relates to *7 levels of energy.
My areas of expertise are marriage and relationships, which is why I refer to myself as a Certified Relationship Coach. Make sense? Cool beans.
*based on the Energetic Self-Perception model developed by Bruce. D. Schneider, founder of iPEC Coaching.
I will teach you how to use self-awareness to connect with the Truth of who you are by asking straight up, no chaser type of questions to challenge your BS (that’s belief system…or whatever else comes to mind).
I also listen for what you don’t say within what you do say to open your perspective and give you clarity on the difference between what you believe, what you say, and what you do.
Since life is all about relationships, how you communicate, behave and connect with others is a direct reflection of who you are. What you believe becomes what you will do. When what you are doing in your marriage or relationship no longer gives you the best outcome, it’s time to check your BS and do something different.
Perception-Reality-Truth© is a concept and curriculum I created to challenge what you believe to be Truth about yourself and others. Focusing on 7 key areas of self-awareness, Energy, Trust, Loyalty, Boundaries, Support, Forgiveness and Compassion, I use a unique combination of worksheets, assessments and thought-provoking questions to open your mindset to new perspectives and interrupt patterns of thinking that don’t work for you or your relationships. Learn more here.
My process will shift your mindset to win-win solutions that work best for your team. I offer a mix of sessions; one-on-one, to focus on showing up authentically, and group to apply what you’ve learned. The goal is to create the vision, develop a plan and hold yourself accountable to step out of your ego and learn how to build connection, restore intimacy and create the peace you want.
Do you have challenges showing up authentically in your marriage?
Let’s get to the source of what is holding you back. I will teach you how to show up authentically to reflect the Truth of who you are and get clear on what you want in your marriage or relationship. You’ll also learn 7 key areas to honor your values and create your own set of non-negotiable rules to be the best for you and your spouse.
Is your spouse on the fence about working with me?
No worries. This is about you getting what you want. You and I can work on happily ever after, or an exit plan. It’s your choice.
Do you think saying, “I do” is a solution for your relationship challenges?
Before you ignore your Truth, think it will fix itself or believe it will change…we should talk. I work with couples who want to prepare their remedy before the marriage “itch” begins.
Do you want to get to know YOU better?
It’s tough to be on a self-awareness journey without directions. I will teach you how to combine the power of energy with creative visioning to design your guide through life. Are you ready for a vision board party with a twist? Click here to learn more about The EnerVision Experience.
I’ve always wanted a husband, a couple of kids and a singing voice.
I got two outta three, so I really can’t complain!
My husband is amazing. He’s my number one supporter and I thank God for him and the life we continue to build together. Read more about our journey here.
My boys are my lifelines and payback for being let’s say…a colorful child. I actually apologized to my mommy and her response was, “Chile please. You were WAY worse than your boys.” <insert blank stare here>
I do it for them because they are my vision of love and happiness. These three are such a huge part of my motivation and I’m grateful for what God has done in our lives. My goal is to pass along a belief system to help support the growth and success of #teamgrove.
Because many are called and few answer.
Because coming from where I’ve been, by the grace of God I’ve been able to transform my pain into passion and for a purpose.
Because I want to connect with others who are struggling with showing up authentically in marriage.
Because I have a responsibility to pay it forward.
Because I have an extraordinary gift to offer and I can help couples interrupt dysfunctional patterns.
Because I’m freakin’ GREAT at what I do.
Because our younger generations are hurting. Before we can help them we must heal the source of their pain and revive our family structure.
Because I want my dreams to become my Truth.
Because this is what I prayed for.
Because I am from a generation of women who passed the touch. I have the choice to drop it or carry on.
Because this is why I fought so hard to understand the Truth of who I am.
Because I am worthy of success.
Because I have choices.
Because I can help you get what you want.